The Ignorance of Faith

Tonight my 10-year-old daughter was reading Good Night Stories for Rebel Girls, in particular the story of Coy Mathis. We talked about our transgender brothers and sisters and tried to explain the concept to my 5-year-old. It seemed pretty logical to him.

I finished reading the 5-year-old his bedtime story, a spiritual book of a different sort (at least, in this household) about the Incredible Hulk. My oldest daughter looked up from her book as I was walking out the door and asked me something that stopped me: "Mom, are transgender people a sign of reincarnation?"

So many things went through my head: I have no idea. Are they? Who knows. I certainly don't. I honestly had never even considered this possibility or interpretation. And when did my daughter get more spiritually evolved and smarter than me?!

"That's a really great question," I said. "I don't know. I never thought about it but that's a great question. I suppose it could be. It's certainly something to think about."
She then asked the next logical thing, "Could science prove it some day?"

No, baby, it can't. I explained to her what "metaphysical" means and how there are some things science can't examine or test. Honestly, I don't want it to.

We have scientific brains. Even the most conservative of Christian who believes the earth is 4000 years old will clamor after any scientific proof that the ark or the Garden of Eden actually existed. We want to KNOW, my friends. As parents, as Christians, as adults, as human beings we want to have THE ANSWER. If we can't or don't have the answer, we get flustered and embarrassed and might even lie our way into an explanation. "Ignorance" is an insult we hurl at our enemies for being stupid and naive. Our team holds all the answers and the other can wallow in their ignorance.

But we are all wallowing in ignorance, whether or not we're willing to admit it. We don't have the answers. I've never died and cannot definitively tell my daughter if reincarnation is real, much less if transgender individuals are proof of its existence. I. Don't. Know.

Our science minds override our spiritual souls and we grasp for facts so our brains can provide an answer. Meanwhile, our spiritual souls are left in the background, desperately hungering for truth. Truth and wisdom come from asking the questions and meditating on possible answers. Facts and knowledge come from questions that lead to testing that leads to verifiable evidence.

Friends, as people of faith, we are people of ignorance. I love science. Physics fascinates me and, for me, human anatomy and systems are proof God exists. But my faith body, my spiritual soul, necessarily is ignorant. That ignorance pushes me again and again to seek God and listen for the Spirit. It is why Jesus and I are in a 41+ year ongoing conversation. I'm the three-year-old in the backseat throwing question after question at God in the front.

We are spiritual beings with lots of questions and we should be nurturing the impulses of that ignorance and inquisitiveness in one another, not stifling it. All too often in our shame or embarrassment at not having the answer, we condemn the questioner, hurling accusations of doubt and weak faith. But it's a lie. The weakness is in the condemner, not the one hungry to learn. It is the one ashamed for not having an answer who suffers from the lack of faith and who commits a grievous sin by shutting down the faith of the person who comes, like a child, with questions and wide eyes.

My baby girl asked a question tonight that I could not answer and that has opened my eyes and spirit to new possibilities. May she never stop asking and may I never become unaware of my ignorance. Both are gifts from God.